Happy new year!
How was your holiday? I am currently in Amsterdam which is another very polyam-friendly city. After some celebrations, I am back at work getting out the monthly newsletter.
If you follow me on Instagram, I would love to hear from you, what kind of content would be helpful and interesting to receive there? Feel free to DM me there (@openrelating) with your suggestions.
Good news - the Open Relating Online Peer Support is back. Depending on how it goes, I hope that we can have monthly sessions. You can already join the peer support Telegram group where we are planning the next session in late January. You will be able to pay for a single session or buy a multipack of 10 sessions to use as you go.
In a few weeks, I will be releasing a series of talks with an exciting collaborator, about navigating polyamory and multigamy later in life. People who discover polyamory after decades of monogamous living often experience a big shock and can find adjustment very difficult.
Want to see more videos with me? DM or email me your suggestions for collaboration and questions you would like answered.
Scroll below for upcoming events and your subscriber discount code!
Dealt with antagonism during the holidays?
Perhaps you tried to come out as polyamorous/multigamous during the holidays and faced criticism or confusion from family and friends.
Or maybe it wasn't the right time to open up about it because you know their opinions.
I have an article on my blog that attempts to address the most common critical statements that people tend to make about polyamory, here is a snippet and you can read the entire thing on my website:
– “it’s just lack of commitment”
Do all monogamous relationships have the same levels of commitment? There’s no universal set of commitments for relationships. Sexual fidelity is most common for monogamy but not universal. So long as I commit to my partners in a way they are happy with, what’s the issue?
– “who has the time?”
Do you want to spend 24/7 together? Then monogamy is right for you. Does someone who works full time and sees family and friends on weekends, bad at monogamy? Are long distance relationships not valid? Time is precious so we need to carefully choose how we spend it. For me, that means with loved ones. The issue is less number of partners and more the economic system we have that owns most of our time.
– “being with one person is already hard enough”
If a relationship feels like hard work, iteans either you aren’t compatible or one or both of you haven’t done enough self work to show up fully and authentically. If it’s too much work, definitely don’t try polyamory. Unless, the reason it feels hard is because you are polyamorous by orientation.
– “it’s just a way for men to get more sex”
From research and observations, women and non-binary people are more likely than men to benefit from polyamory. While there are men who claim polyamory in order to have more sexual partners, there are also men who claim to want monogamy in order to get laid, but that doesnt tarnish all monogamous people.
-” it isn’t natural”
Nature is never static. What feels natural is subjective and based on inherited traits and environmental and social influence. Evolution prefers diversity, so having different relating options is actually the most natural thing.
In December I recorded a 20 minute conversation on the Mix Nashville podcast. I was asked about my work as a polyamory-informed therapist, about my coaching and about facilitating play fighting workshops. You can listen directly here or download the episode on Spotify.
Upcoming Events
*Discount code to subscribers available for in-person events and online products such as recorded workshops and talks.
- in-person events code: emaillw (10% off)
- online products code: emailrw (half price all products)
If you are in a relationship and are navigating the journey to polyamory, or have hit a bump on the road and could use some support, this package is available, designed to make a big impact in a short space of time.
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£480.00
Relationship Coaching Starter Package for Couples
This package includes 4 sessions in total.
After completing check-out, you will receive a discount code via email, which... Read more |
I wish you the very best for 2025. As much as it is shaping up to be a challenging year for many people, our ability to live authentically without shame or guilt and connect with community, will be at the heart of our hopeful future.
With love, Roy
